Like so many others, I am still reeling from the shock of Kobe Bryant’s death. The grief is global and we all feel it. Regardless of your relationship to basketball or Los Angeles or the man himself, the pain of such a bright light struck down so unexpectedly is palpable and personal. We all want to hug our loved ones a little tighter, grateful that we can.
It’s in tragic moments like these that we can really feel our connection to one another. Where normally our differences would separate us, in this grief, we are united. We have visceral clarity that we are all of one consciousness.
Like so many others, I mired myself in the news yesterday, the reactions pouring in on TV and social media. I felt a personal connection to the tough, tearful young guys gathering at Staples Center. I felt connected to Jerry West. To Shaq. To everyone at the Grammys.
Sharing this tragedy unites us and reminds us that grief is universal. All human beings experience loss and the unbearable suffering that follows. We are united as a generation, the ones who were touched by Kobe Bryant’s life and death. Just as generations before us were equally sadly united and moved by deaths of other luminaries who were their contemporaries. They are the stars who belonged to us.
I think of Princess Diana, how shocking and unbelievable it was when she was killed in a car crash in 1997. I was in my 20s, working as a waitress. It was the middle of my shift. I can see the moment clearly even now, forever frozen in time as an emotional scar. It didn’t matter that I’m not British or a royal follower. She was a light, and she was extinguished. I saved the newspaper reports from that day. I have them even now.
It feels the same with Kobe. News travels much faster now and we have more outlets to share our grief and memories, but that overwhelming feeling of time stopping is the same. And as profound as our sadness is, presumably it’s nothing compared to that of his family, his wife and children and parents. It’s impossible not to feel your heart break for them and for every sadness, every bit of pain and loss in the world.
As we grieve and heal, may we remember this shared consciousness, that we are not as different from each other as we’re inclined to think. May we extend a bit more compassion to others. May we be kinder and gentler. May we remember that grief and pain is universal, and there but for the grace of God do we get another day to love, to live.